He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
