Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
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