dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Porn is love you can see.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Randomize
