whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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