whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
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It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He felt like a one man threesome
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
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