I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize