Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
