you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize