I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
