Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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