That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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