he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
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She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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