Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
