i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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