if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Randomize
