hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
