my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
