Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
