did you get engaged???
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
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I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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