As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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