who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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