thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
