I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
honey bunches of taint.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
