You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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