My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
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