guess who came home with a hottie last night
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(