Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
