I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize