I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
