Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize