Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
