i'm lost and i look like a hooker
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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