I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
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This is a from a Navy guy. "Sheets to the wind" is slang for how drunk or disoriented you are. Most wooden "old navy" ships had three masts. In some circles, all the sails on a single mast is "a sheet." One sheet to the wind, you are in trouble. Two sheets, a lot of trouble. Three sheets, totally screwed up and about to founder. Thus, he is in a lot of sexual trouble.
One drink away from compromising your own morals eh?
That was a well thought out and lucid statement. Kudos and thanks.
Sounds like someone's about to come about on their sexual orientation. Oh well, it's all rum, buggery, and the lash anyway, innit?
Sense: this makes none.
To you, it makes none, mainly because you are still watching Nickelodeon.