If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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