Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
