And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
