Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
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