either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
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