your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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