Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Randomize
