remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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