headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
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what probably happen: Bartender rammed his head into the wall, bounce gave him a snake bite in the neck to subdue him, then the cop let him go b/c he didn't want the kid who pissed his pants in the back of his cop car. and the laid part was that piece of rabbit fur he rubs on his cock every night
And then you woke up.
He got laid like a bitch in jail after pissing on a cops shoes. I call bs.
dude is from east tennessee. i don't doubt it one bit.lol
Dudes from chatt TN so probably did happen
Butt sex in jail don't. Count as sex....unless u are willing
If you pissed on a cops shoes while drunk you'd be in jail dumbass
what he left out is his new butt buddy he made while in jail.
You guys are dumb it must have been a female cop
Exactly how many of you are from Tennessee? He is probably from a small town with 4 cops like myself and they knew him and let him go. It happens a lot. Gotta love small town Tennessee.
Yea i call bs. If this little douche who obviously can't handle his alcohol pissed on my boots when I was working he'd be fucked. Not the laid he's talking about, but a bad fucked.
@ premeau.: the rabbit furthing made me lol. It's just so weird.
Biggest lie on this website
Haha been there
Yeah, I imagine after that 6 month sentence you served in prison that would feel nice.
Such a fucking liar. Kill yourself.
Are we related?
When you say "headbutt" did you actually mean you stuck your head in the butt of the bartender? Cause I doubt someone would fuck you otherwise... And who the fuck bites people? Are you a dog? A little kid? Mike tyson? As for the peeing, pretty sure you pissed on your own shoes as it dribbled down your leg, perhaps you should lay off the booze a little
For those of you that doubt this, this guy is my roommate. It's completely true.
Wowzerers! What town is that?!
I guess getting fucked in the ass in the drunk tank counts as getting some .
Could someone kill the guy who texted this? In no way would that be a bad thing
Fleshlights don't count.
Premeau nailed it. That's exactly what happened. Or, he stayed home with mom and dad and watched a PBS special on Easter and went to bed at 9.
Maybe all of that stuff is why you got laid.