I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
