Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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