Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Drunk walkin through police station. America
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
