I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
