Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
