she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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