Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
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