oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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